Within my darkness I was alone, through hell I walked with no one by my side. The feelings of depression, despair, abandonment, loneliness, pain, and betrayal flowed violently through my veins, submerging my heart. There I held on so tightly to false promises made by others, that was nothing more than poison to my soul, to false hope that was nothing more than venom injected into my heart, it was there that I seen there was no light at the end of the tunnel. It was there in my brokenness that I realized parts of me needed to die.

When you look into the mirror and you see the devil looking back at you, with no love found for yourself or others around you. You search, but can’t find peace, only momentary escapes, the only hope you feel you have left is to keep chasing them until they finally do you a favor by taking your life. Or whatever strand of life remains, it’s not even surviving, it’s living for something outside of yourself to escape the pain that you hold within yourself, no hope, not knowing how to let go.

The world seems to be a blur one moment to the next and so many forgotten in between, how did I make it here, this isn’t a part of the life that I dreamed. Torn in half at the seems, tearing myself a part from within this darkened heart. Not knowing why, only knowing parts of me needs to die

Here, is where I stopped searching for the light at the end of the tunnel. Here is where the fire ignited within consuming me, purifying me from all that I had been. Here is where I stopped searching for the light and became the light illuminating the whole fucking tunnel before me. Here is where I continue to grow, to evolve, and to become the better me.