When I left Denominational Christianity, I was searching for answers, longing for more. It was then that I realized what I was searching for was real.

I want real.
A real spiritual freedom that is not bound by traditions, rules, regulations, and requirements.

I want peace.
Peace from all the pressure found within institutional religions.

I want love.
Unconditional love that loves me, so I can then love myself and others.

I want to live.
Within Christianity, there was so much focus on dying to self that it led to self-loathing. Dying to self became a status symbol.

I want to be authentic.
I never observed authenticity within the confines of Christianity. I saw masks over individuals, and I wore one myself. The mask was important because it showed others what the group as a whole wanted to see. The mask was a survival mechanism because, without it, you were basically an outcast.

I want safety.
Being raised in a cult system called the Independent Fundamental Baptist, I never once felt safe. As I became involved in other groups and denominations within Christianity, I again never felt safe.

I want good.
Throughout Christianity, I observed a theme that we are born evil. Are we really born evil, or are we actually born good with the propensity to sin? This teaching is a core belief that allows for striking a child and then calling it godly discipline. I know not all of Christianity believes this, but because of the influence of Christianity, it’s still legal to spank a child in the USA, and it is because of this very belief.

I want more.
Even as a child, I began to see that much of Christianity was limited to what that particular denominational system or church taught and believed. It was a constant competition among pastors, evangelists, missionaries, etc., to push what they believed as the only right way. I want more than that. I want to learn and never stop learning and changing without being pressured or forced to believe what a particular church or denomination teaches.

I want rest.
Ah, sweet, sweet rest. The first 60 years of my life were spent being busy, busy, busy. To be a good, active Christian in a local church, there was constant pressure to be busy in that church and to attend services every time the doors were open. So what did I do? I went to church or did church activities. I had no rest, very little family time, and I was so tired. I wanted rest so dearly.
Being out of Christianity’s psychological control, I cannot only rest but now I can actually think. When I can think, I can meditate, process, and ponder so many things.

I want change.
I lived in a religious world with a motto of “I will not change.” Change was looked upon as compromise. Compromise was considered sin.

I want a relationship.
I’ve spoken to hundreds of individuals who have left the church, and this is the most significant and painful part of leaving: discovering that all these people you thought were friends no longer speak to you. I’ve experienced this myself, losing every single friend. All my friends were from within that particular organization or religion. The moment I left, bam, they were all gone overnight. I want real, authentic, true friendship that isn’t bound by religion.

When I left Christianity I finally found all of this and much much more. I found Jesus.